Funny instagram bio

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HEY! We have funny instagram bio for you, you will really enjoy these bio’s must read please to make them yours,

  • Ah, I just love the whooshing sound that deadlines make as they fly by.
  • All this time, I thought I wanted a job. Turns out, I just wanted a paycheck.
  • An evolutionary mass of atoms whose sole instinct is survival.
  • Avoid following the masses blindly. Every so often, the “m” in “masses” is silent.
  • Bacon would probably cost less if we could slice it with lasers.
  • Beauty is only skin deep. But ugly? Ah, that goes all the way to the bone!
  • Can’t seem to recall where I stole this bio from or why.
  • Certified meat-eater!
  • Chocolate never asks questions. Chocolate understands.
  • Don’t call me crazy! I prefer the term mentally hilarious.
  • Don’t tell anyone, but I’m a ninja.
  • Even the Joker is jealous of my smile.
  • Ever since my parents told me not to talk to strangers, I haven’t talked to myself.
  • Every butt, big or small, is special. Learn to love each and every one of them.
  • Everyone has me figured out, which makes it super easy for me.
  • Extremely passionate about not starving to death.
  • Guilty as charged! My hotness caused global warming.
  • Here to steer clear of my family and friends on Facebook.
  • How much does a hippie weigh? An Instagram!
  • I desperately need two six-month vacations this year.
  • I haven’t been myself ever since I was born.
  • I put the “elation” in “public relations.”
  • I put the “hot” in “psychotic.”
  • I just want to jump out of the window and land on a huge pile of dessert.
  • If you’re going to be stupid, at least be entertaining.
  • Keeping secrets is totally easy for me. However, this ain’t the case for the people I tell them to.
  • Life is too short to be updating Instagram bios.
  • Living proof that nobody is perfect.
  • Long story short, humanity is good for a laugh if nothing else.
  • Meh is the new normal.
  • Memes were my thing even before they existed on Instagram.
  • My constant craving for desserts is becoming worrisome.
  • My favorite extreme sport is avoiding people.
  • Of course, I talk to myself! Where else would I get professional advice?
  • Okay, I’m pretty sure this isn’t my home planet.
  • Real-life me isn’t any less ridiculous . . . in case you weren’t wondering.
  • Sarcasm connoisseur.
  • Sausage puns are the wurst!
  • Saying no to alcohol is a daily routine for me. It never listens, though!
  • Sleeping comes so naturally to me that I can do it with both of my eyes closed.
  • So what if I can’t sing? I’ll sing anyway.
  • Super cali swagilistic hella dopeness!
  • The Earth’s rotation really makes my day.
  • There will be no adulting today.
  • This will be my last Instagram bio ever.
  • Too rad to be sad.
  • Wait, where am I? And how in the world did I get here?
  • Weirdness is a proven side effect of awesomeness.
  • When I tried the 30-day weight loss diet, I lost 30 days!
  • When you’re just too socially awkward for real life, Instagram welcomes you with open arms.
  • Who said I’m funny? I’m actually very mean, but everyone thinks I’m just kidding.
  • You drink too much and gossip too much. Let’s be friends.

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